||Susan’s Rant – Week
of August 30th
Being in my early thirties and dating
feels like I'm going on a merry-go-round of first job interviews. After
I speak with a guy for five minutes, I already know if I want a relationship
with him. At that point, I have activated my exit strategy for the night.
I guess my challenge is that I am a direct person and can not stand
all the small talk of the dates. Yes, I have commitment issues, I can't
even commit to a one hour dinner date. In reality, I like
the 'hunt' of catching the guy but need to release them back into the
wild if they are less than 110 lbs, married, homeless or gay.
Actually, I would date gay men but I do not want
to live a 'Will & Grace'
type life. At first, I thought 'Will & Grace' was harmful to straight
women but now my view has changed. Many women (including myself)
who live in cities are exposed to many great gay men. They are great
people, friends and dinner dates. The challenge is that I compare
the great time I have with my 'gay husbands' with the dates I have with
straight men. I refuse to say 'fag hag' because I am no 'hag' and I have
control issues so they are my 'husbands'. No, I have not married
any gay men but I do receive the benefits of the wife like great gifts,
spa days, trips without having to have sex with them. Recently, I had
a fight with one of my 'gay husbands' because I was personally frustrated
that all these men I date were not as fun as this particular gay husband.
Now, I realize that I will need a few men (both straight and gay) that
satisfy my emotional, intellectual, fashion and sexual needs. No,
this does not mean that I want to have Caligula Roman type orgies (PAUSE
-.need to fantasize a bit) but that I now can appreciate all types of
men and where they fit in my life.
Right now I'm going through my 'Blue' period.
I do enjoy dating the 'White' collar men because of the intellectual
conversations but I really love dating 'Blue' collar men. They are
so primal, sensuous and masculine. For instance, when I meet the 'Blue'
collar men and we start talking they sniff my neck to smell my perfume
or to get a better look at my cleavage. Either way that basic primal
attraction gets me excited. Now my challenge is to not rush into
a relationship before I get to know them. My most recent experience:
I was dating
a UPS driver. There is a new UPS TV commercial that says 'What can
Brown do for you?' Well, Brown can call me back is what he can do
for me. So now I have decided to date Fed Ex drivers since I get a tracking
number and can make sure that they are not making any unscheduled
I realize that my 'Blue' collar men are the same as my
'White' collar men. They are both unpredictable. That is why I love them
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